I have sat with this post for many days wondering if I should or should not touch on this subject and share an experience that I had in the early hours of Friday morning. Whilst laying in bed unable to sleep watching the time tick away on the verge of sleep but wide awake a visitor came to me. I relate very strongly to Eagle Spirit and recently have noticed him around more and more. In the early hours of the morning, he decided it was time that I confront the darkness within. Having battled depression for almost 3 decades and finally befriended the wounded little girl within, it was still a daunting experience to dip my toes back into that black void.
Eagle presented me with an interesting view of the planet and all its creatures. I see the eagle as a majestic creature that soars the skies, seeing things from a greater perspective, as close to spirit as we only dream to be. Eagle decided to present me with a different, expansive view – by nature he is a predator he soars the skies searching for his prey, he has been observed starting fires to flush out animals for his next meal. It does not emotionally calculate who is worthy or unworthy it is purely a survival maneuver. I was a little shocked to look at the eagle this way, but he continued with his analogy.
Until we learn to embrace the idea that we all have a predator and prey, a hero and a villain, a victim and a courageous soul in us then all is not as it seems. By denying the darkness/shadow aspect of our true nature we are denying a fundamental part of the self. This is not a new concept. I once read an interview where Mother Teresa was asked how she became the saint that she was. She replied that she found Hitler within. This is a confronting statement, and many will cringe at the thought of what this is implying. Put simply, what she was stating was that we all can love and hate, creating beauty in the world or destroying it. It is our choices to make daily – to choose the light over the darkness, to choose what we align our soul with, the divine, the light or the darkness, the abyss. Denying the existence of either darkness or light does not mean that it does not exist. It simply means that on so many levels we are suppressing a part of the self. Like anything denied being seen and heard, it will eventually rise and create destruction from within. In many that darkness is a representation of the unhealed wounds from our childhood, buried deep, suppressed, and never allowed to see the light of day. To shine the light on the darkness allows us to integrate all aspects of who we are, to love all aspects of who we are, and to release unhealthy patterns and habits that create destructive sabotaging patterns in our lives.
Eagle expressed to me that when we are constantly looking up to the heavens, we don’t see what is in front of us. We can get lost in the lofty ideas and neglect to ground them into this reality. When we only look at the positive aspects of anything, we ignore the true nature of all things. We need to know when to bring out the positive aspects of our internal predator/warrior as it is all part of survival, who we are and a skill to be cultivated. We need to be aware of our ability to create because what can create, we can also destroy. This is also a natural part of nature. Nature knows when to create and when to let go. Nature understands the balance that is needed to keep in harmony. Nature understands that new growth requires the old to be released back to the earth creating fuel for the birth of the new.
Eagle went on to explain that when we only see beauty, we deny a part of ourselves that will eventually grow and find a way to express itself, negatively or positively, through illness, disease, sabotaging behavior, and repeated patterns. We need to accept all parts of the whole dark and light weak and strong, predator and prey, hunter and hunted, warrior and victim. Otherwise, we are limiting our vision to only what we see.
When we see only beauty all around us, we are also denying part of the Earth and all its elements. The Earth in her undeniable beauty is also a powerful force of destruction. She is all things. He said when we look at nature there is a balance, nature by nature is brutal and unforgiving, it is loving and nurturing, it feeds us and shelters us, but it can also take it all away. It is functional and will protect itself and its survival. We do not own her, We are privileged to walk upon her.
We are lulled into a false sense of being when we feel all love and connection and don’t embrace all aspects of nature and her creatures. When confronted with dangerous or unpleasant situations in nature we feel fearful and think we have failed to be spiritual and connected. In seeing only, the positives we are also denying nature all her true being. Beautiful, breathtaking vicious, and brutal at the same time. In denying the polarity that exists we cause a separation of what is.
We cannot truly relate to spirit and creator if we deny seeing things for what they are – the Hunter and the Hunted – we have all experienced both. We deny being either because we see it as a fault, or as only negative. It is our nature and it is the balance of the web. Take what you need but also understand that you must be willing to give back equally for what you receive. This is the cosmic rule, as all experiences are equal, all things are equal and all things have a right to be. Denying anything that is denying our true nature. It is denying wholeness and connection. We need not judge what is, it simply is.
In acceptance of all things and all aspects of our true nature, we accept nature itself. We are connected, we are experiencing a wholeness that cannot be understood until the balance of our dark nature and light nature are complete and integrated. In accepting what is within, we can only understand and commune with the elements of the external world. We must use our power wisely, understanding that our actions have consequences. Even what is perceived as a noble act may not be in the interest of the greater whole.
When we start playing and interacting with energy, we need to be very aware of our intention and even with the best intention understand that our needs, our desires may not be in the best interest of the greater whole. Our internal world is but a tiny representation of the greater whole. So, when we start to play with energy, we need to remember that our actions have consequences that we do not immediately see. We are the tapestry of the whole and our role is to be responsible for our acts and actions as they ripple into the external world affecting everything that surrounds us.
After having time to digest all this information I understood that looking at a word in its limited perceived meaning is the same as looking at nature through a limited lens. When we think of the word predator or hunter many will have a negative image pop into their head. When we think warrior or hero, we are more inclined to think of someone noble and courageous.
What if we were able to see things from a higher perception, what if we were able to observe the behavior of our environment and those around us, what if we were able to sit in stillness and silence feeling, hearing, and sensing the dance of life? Would the word predator enter your head? What the eagle is asking us is to see things in their entirety, to observe the world through an extended lens, and to stop limiting our view through the singularity of our limited beliefs. If we look closely enough, we can change any situation into a learning experience. Into an expansive experience that allows our soul to grow. When we look at the world through limited lenses, we deny ourselves the experience of seeing ourselves in our entirety. We deny ourselves the opportunity to grow and cultivate skills into a positive strength. We are stuck in a cycle of judgment and small-minded thinking.
Having been someone who has struggled with and befriended their darkness, the void that was something I scrambled from, medicated against, and tried to fix, change, and deny. Therefore, this experience has been an extremely confronting revelation. We can know things, but there is a difference between knowing something and embodying that knowing and transforming that knowledge into wisdom.
I have sat for days feeling anger and rage toward those who have ridiculed, rejected, hurt, abused, and abandoned me. I was still trying to attribute the negative traits of the predator to situations and experiences. Old loops were fighting to creep in and trigger old suicidal ideations. The harder I resisted the louder Eagles voice became. Asking me to see, to hear, and to acknowledge. The darkness within me was asking the same from me. See me, hear me, and release me to the light. So slowly I am working through this process one by one.
Our thoughts can prey on our weaknesses, our thoughts become the predator that pounces when the opportunity is right, taking advantage of the moments where we are most vulnerable. Right? What if we flip this script? What if we look at these moments as times when we are at our strongest? The Mindbody will not allow anything to come forward that would threaten our survival. What if these moments truly are where we are at our strongest, where we are the warrior/hero/ What if this is the moment where we have used our observation skills to determine that we are ready to release the traumas and limiting beliefs of the past? What if this is your higher self, telling you that you are ready to cultivate these skills within, to sit in the darkness, to wait, to be still, to listen, to see, and to seize growth opportunities?
Nature shows us its incredible beauty and how powerful and brutal it can be. Life is no different. We experience much beauty, but at times life seems brutal in its lessons and experiences. By changing the way, we perceive each experience we can change the impact it has on our lives. We can turn a negative into a positive. The Darkness in the world is real. But if we are willing to face our darkness and integrate it into our being, we become stronger to fight the darkness out there. Become the fearless warrior and the hero in your story by confronting and learning from the darkness presenting itself within. Embrace it as everything is an opportunity. Your reality is dictated by your perception.
The Eagle came to me as my mentor and guide, but the animals have been gathering and guiding me for months to create guidance for others through the medicine of plants and nature.
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